"Connection is the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued."* –Brené Brown

I'll be honest with you: when the pandemic hit and we all went remote, I thought we'd adapt quickly. We had video calls. We had Slack. We had all the tools for "staying connected."

But here's what I didn't anticipate—what I don't think any of us truly anticipated—was how fundamentally the quality of our connections would change. How isolated we'd feel even in a sea of virtual faces. How exhausting it would become to show up on screen after screen, meeting after meeting, somehow feeling less seen than ever before.

The numbers tell a sobering story. Research shows that social isolation became a significant concern during remote work, with studies finding that perceived isolation negatively impacted both job performance and well-being.

But here's what surprised me even more: returning to the office didn't automatically solve the problem.

Some people stayed remote because it genuinely improved their lives in meaningful ways—better work-life balance, reduced commute stress, more focused work time. Others eagerly returned to the office, hoping to recapture that sense of connection they'd been missing. Yet many found that simply being in the same physical space didn't restore what had been lost. We were back in the building, but still behind our screens. Back at our desks, but still disconnected.

The truth is, whether you're working remotely, in the office, or in a hybrid arrangement, connection doesn't happen automatically. It happens through intention. Through deliberate choices to show up, to see others, to be seen. Location matters less than we thought. Intentionality matters more than we realized.

But here's the thing: connection isn't a luxury. It's not something we get to if we have time after the "real work" is done. Connection IS the work. It's the foundation upon which everything else—collaboration, innovation, resilience, engagement—is built.

Let me tell you what connection is NOT: It's not forced team-building exercises. It's not mandatory fun.

It's not a perfectly curated LinkedIn post or a polished company video.

Real connection happens in the authentic, vulnerable moments of human recognition and shared understanding. It's what happens when:

• A colleague admits they're struggling with a difficult situation, and instead of offering quick advice, you simply say, "That sounds really hard. Tell me more."

• A leader shares their own uncertainty about a decision, creating space for others to do the same

• Team members celebrate not just the big wins, but the small moments of progress

• Someone expresses genuine excitement about an idea, and that energy becomes contagious• You acknowledge stress, pressure, or exhaustion—not as weaknesses to hide, but as shared human experiences

"Empathy is being concerned about the human being, not just their output." – Simon Sinek

If connection is the destination, empathy is the vehicle that gets us there.

Empathy isn't just about being nice. It's about seeing your colleagues as whole human beings—people managing pressure, navigating challenges, experiencing joy and disappointment, carrying responsibilities and dreams that extend far beyond their job titles.

When we lead and work with empathy, we create the conditions where real connection becomes possible. We move beyond transactional relationships to something deeper—a workplace where people feel genuinely seen and valued for who they are, not just what they produce.

Think about the last time someone at work truly demonstrated empathy toward you. Maybe they:

• Noticed you were having a rough day and checked in

• Remembered something important happening in your life and asked about it

• Gave you grace when you made a mistake

• Celebrated your win as if it were their own

How did that feel? That's the power of empathy. And that's what creates connection.

Staying vulnerable is a risk we have to take if we want to experience connection." – Brené Brown

Here's where it gets uncomfortable: Connection requires vulnerability. And vulnerability is scary. As a leader, showing vulnerability might look like:

• Admitting when you don't have all the answers

• Sharing your own learning process, including the mistakes

• Expressing genuine emotions—excitement, concern, uncertainty

• Asking for help or input

As a team member, it might look like:

• Speaking up when you're confused or need support

• Sharing an idea that feels risky

• Acknowledging when you're overwhelmed

• Expressing appreciation or concern authentically

I know this is hard. Trust me—I'm a conflict avoider by nature. My first instinct is always to retreat, to protect myself, to appear like I have it all together. But every single time I've found the courage to be vulnerable—to show up as my authentic, imperfect self—the connection that follows is deeper and more meaningful than anything perfectly curated could ever produce.Let me share a moment that changed how I understood the power of vulnerability at work.

I had a 1:1 scheduled with one of my direct reports—someone based on the other side of the world. I'd just come from a particularly difficult meeting. The kind that leaves you shaken, questioning yourself, carrying a weight you can't quite put down.

The 1:1 started. He said hello and asked how I was doing.

And I started crying.

There I was, this person's manager, someone who was supposed to have it together, completely falling apart on a video call. I was mortified. Embarrassed. This wasn't how leaders were supposed to show up.

But here's what happened: he didn't look uncomfortable. He didn't rush to fill the silence or try to fix it.

He showed genuine compassion. He gave me space to feel and process. He simply said, "Take your time. I'm here."

That moment—that gift of being seen in my struggle—changed our relationship fundamentally. Yes, I felt vulnerable and exposed. But what I didn't expect was how it would unlock something profound.

After that, he began sharing his own fears and worries with me in ways he never had before. I was able to support him at a deeper level than I'd been able to previously. He gained insight into what I was carrying as a leader, and in response, he asked to take on more. He wanted to help. Our working relationship transformed from manager-employee to something much more human—two people navigating challenges together, supporting each other's growth, committed to each other's success.

That's what happens when we let go of perfectionism and show our struggle. When we discuss our challenges authentically with co-workers. When we show emotion—whether it's the tears, the excitement, the frustration, or the joy. People are more likely to want to collaborate with us. To open up to us about their own struggles or aspirations. Our vulnerability and authenticity unlock doors and strengthen relationships in ways we can't even imagine when we're hiding behind our carefully constructed professional facades.

And here's what's crucial to understand: When leaders model vulnerability with appropriate boundaries, they give permission for everyone else to do the same. They create psychological safety. They signal that it's okay to be human here.

"The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood." – Ralph G. Nichols

One of the most powerful ways we connect is through recognizing our shared experiences.

When someone says, "I'm stressed about this deadline," and you respond with, "Me too—let's figure this out together," you've just created connection.

When a colleague celebrates landing a new client and you can feel their genuine excitement and share in it, you've created connection.When you acknowledge, "This change is hard for all of us," you've validated a shared experience and reminded people they're not alone.

We connect when we identify with each other's humanity—when we see ourselves in someone else's struggle, joy, fear, or triumph. That's why authenticity matters so much. You can't fake shared experience. People know the difference between genuine recognition and performative empathy.

"One doesn't have to operate with great malice to do great harm. The absence of empathy and understanding are sufficient." – Charles M. Blow

If empathy builds connection, apathy destroys it.

Apathy shows up when:

• We're too busy or distracted to truly listen

• We treat people as resources rather than humans

• We ignore signs that someone is struggling

• We can't be bothered to celebrate others' successes

• We go through the motions without authentic engagement

• We stop caring about the human impact of our decisions

Apathy is insidious because it's often not intentional. We're overwhelmed. We're exhausted. We're managing our own stress. But when we allow apathy to take hold, we erode the very foundation of connection—and with it, the foundation of a thriving culture.

Here's something important: not everyone can show up in the same ways at work. For many people—especially people of color, people with disabilities, and women—the conditions for authentic expression simply aren't there. Systemic barriers, biases, and very real professional risks shape who feels safe enough to be vulnerable, to express emotion, to show their full humanity.

We need to move beyond the simplistic "bring your whole self to work" rhetoric and acknowledge that authenticity isn't equally available to everyone. Connection isn't about everyone expressing themselves in the same way or demanding vulnerability from those who don't have the safety to offer it.

What matters is our ability to acknowledge shared human experiences—especially across our differences. When we can recognize our common ground while honoring what makes us different, something powerful happens. The shared stress of a deadline. The excitement about a breakthrough.

The challenge of navigating change. The joy of celebrating a milestone. These moments of recognition transcend individual differences and remind us of our shared humanity.

Connection happens when we make space for people to participate in ways that feel safe for them, while actively working to create environments where more people can feel genuinely seen and valued.

Connection doesn't require a complete culture overhaul. It starts with small, intentional actions. Start meetings by genuinely checking in on how people are. Share your own challenges and learning moments. Celebrate progress, not just outcomes. Be present in conversations. Ask questions that

show you care about the whole person. Notice when someone is struggling and reach out. Practice active, generous listening. Acknowledge shared experiences and struggles. Express genuine appreciation regularly. Remember that small gestures of connection compound over time.

Connection doesn't happen by accident in today's work environment. We have to create the conditions for it deliberately and tend to those conditions continuously.

But here's the beautiful thing: every single one of us has the power to create connection right now, in this moment, with the next person we interact with. We don't need permission. We don't need a formal program. We just need to show up as our authentic, empathetic, human selves—and invite others to do the same.

That's how we build workplaces where people don't just survive—they truly connect, belong, and thrive.

• Daring Greatly by Brené Brown

• The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown

• Dare to Lead by Brené Brown

• Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Travis Bradberry and Jean Greaves

• "The Power of Vulnerability" TED Talk by Brené Brown

• "Work From Home During the COVID-19 Outbreak: The Impact on Employees" (Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health)

• "The Loneliness of the Hybrid Worker" (MIT Sloan Management Review)

• "Empathy: The Most Important Leadership Skill" (Harvard Business Review)